Saturday, February 20, 2010

You can't play on broken strings,


You can't feel anything,that your heart does not want to feel.
I can't tell you something that ain't real.
Oh it tears me up,I want to hold on but it hurts to much
I've tried to forgive,but its never enough to make it all okay.
Let me hold you for the last time,its the last chance to feel again.

Steamboat,Mahjong&Blackjack last night.
Jobaby,zehzeh,Jess and Kevin came over in the afternoon and left for UK funfair,
Joey,Zz,Sam,Pam&ZTB came over later in the evening.
Basically,had steamboat for dinner. Mahjong later on! (: then blackjack.
We need more sessions like these,I guess? Its a way to keep my mind off for awhile.
Something seems missing last night,I suppose it was you. Your pressence,everything.
I tried to keep my mind off you,it just somehow seems so difficult.
Even when I sleep,you appear in my dreams.&when I'm awake,
I'm back to reality coming to know you're no longer here with me,&it hurts.
I feel empty,my heart doesn't feel whole anymore. I know nothings gonna change,
everything's gonna just stay this way. But nothing makes me happier than seeing that you are,
nothing comes as close. My heart ached the other day,knowing you were drained dead tired,
and breaks my heart everytime to know you're unwell,
though I know its suppose to be non of my concerns anymore,
But I can't just sit there,knowing you're not doing good and feel nothing about it.
I look at our pictures,and realise how much we've gone through how we'd come so far.
and it hurts to know,what we've build has fallen to pieces and not wanting to fix it back.
We're leaving the lightbulb in the house to die,choosing to live in darkness,
Nothing can explain how much,how ever so much my heart aches.



Anything to numb the heartache? Please,please take my pain away.



So what do you do,when you see the one you love,just walk away?
Take good care of your health,it pains me to see you unwell each time,without fail.
&Yes,I love you ever so much. But I guess,I have,to let you go.
Though my heart yearns for you,I have to respect your decision.
Its so hard,to say goodbye. (U)
I just wished there was more than that,about me and you.
But in any case,you'll always be,my favourite boy.



Fav was being such a sweetheart,to drop me an offline message on msn last night.

Thank you Fav for your encouraging words,(L)


Two is better than one,
Only when,the two consists of you and me.

2 comments:

LM said...

I stumbled upon your blog and started following it the other day. I must say though, that I know exactly how you feel and what you're going through. People say it gets easier and I guess in a way it does. If by getting easier they mean that I don't think about him every waking moment and only think about him every other moment of the day.

I know you don't know me but I wanted to say that I'm sorry about what you're going through.♥

Rachael Pong said...

(: But sometimes,it just isn't as easy as said.